Some Pain, but No Gain

The good news is that I haven't gained any weight in the last week. On the other hand, I haven't lost any, either. I'm still at 290. It's really frustrating. I have been tracking my food, and I have been exercising every day. This is the point where I would usually say, "Forget this. If I'm not losing weight, I might as well have Coke and pizza." But I'm not going to do that this time. Instead, I'm just going to continue what I've been doing. If I haven't lost anything by the end of the month, then I'll readjust what I'm doing. For now, this still feels right.

As I said, I have not missed a single Daily Burn workout. I'm really enjoying these. I can feel myself getting stronger. My balance has improved, and my endurance is improving, too. For the first two weeks I'm doing the same three routines, and I can tell that I'm able to push myself harder than I was at the beginning. I have had consistently sore muscles, not so sore that I don't want to move, but sore enough that I can tell I'm doing something.

I've been doing great with lunches this week. I always have a salad in the fridge at work in case I forget to bring mine. If I don't forget, I can still have the salad with my lunch. Today I'm having a salad and a winter soup with rutabaga and carrots. Yum!

I've also managed to eat something for breakfast every day. This is a huge issue for me. I hate eating in the morning. But I've been forcing myself to at least have a piece of fruit or a Fiber One bar. Some days, I've even managed to have a "fried" (non-stick pan with a spritz of oil) egg on a whole wheat English muffin.

I haven't made it to the gym yet to get some miles in. I need to do some mending on my workout clothes before I go, but I should have that done tonight. I've been doing my DB workouts in my pajamas. I just throw a sports bra on under them. Not how I want to appear at the gym, haha! If I can get the pants mended tonight, I can get some miles in tomorrow after work.

The one downside to my week so far: I saw a video of myself. I'm playing a part in a tutorial for work. Last week they filmed a rehearsal, and I was able to see the footage yesterday. UGH!! I know I'm big. I've seen pictures; I have a mirror. But I look so much bigger on that video! I couldn't believe it.
On the other hand, I have a much prettier face than I thought I did, and I think those workouts are improving my posture. I usually have a little bit of a hunch (I'm 5'9" and wear an I cup bra, so...). But in the video, I'm shot from the side for part of it. No hunch! Hooray! I have noticed I have way less back pain since starting these workouts.

And bonus! I have only had one headache this week! It was just a regular headache, too, not a migraine. That's a huge deal. I don't know if it's because of the exercising or because my salt intake is way down or what, but I'm happy about it.

So that's my week so far. I'm still hoping for a woosh on the scale to bring me into the 280s by the end of the week, but if it doesn't happen, I'm going to try to focus on the other positive changes happening in my body.

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Feeling the Burn

Well, this has been a week of good news/bad news. As per my resolution, I found something good to go along with every bad thing that happened.

The bad news is that my eating has been totally chaotic. I've been working late, skipping breakfast (and sometimes lunch), and running errands in my down time. This has led to fast food runs and crazy snacking.

The good news is that next week should be so very much better. I've already planned my food out, I'm going to spend part of Monday packing my lunches ahead, and dinners should be a snap.

The bad news is that my water aerobics class was cancelled. They didn't have enough people sign up for it. I was really looking forward to it.

The good news is that I'm a week into my Daily Burn program, and I am loving it! I have exercised EVERY SINGLE DAY this week. That is a record for me. I'm really feeling it, too. I'm not bored, and I am really looking forward to advancing to the next level. That is still several weeks away, though.

The bad news is that I have not done any walking. I haven't really even been walking my dogs. It's been so cold out that even my furbabies don't want to be out longer than they have to, so our potty walks aren't even hitting a quarter mile. Not worth counting.

The good news is that I plan on getting back on the treadmill. Since I do my workouts in the morning, I can still go to the gym in the evenings. I'm not going to do that for a couple more weeks, though. I want to get my eating back in line first, so don't look for update on my miles yet.

That's my week. I have been feeling really great lately. I know part of it is that Xmas is over (worst holiday of the year for me--tons of stress and really no benefits), and part of it is the days getting brighter. But I think there's more to it than that. I really feel like things are going to be better this year: my weight, my fitness, my finances, my job, and my relationships.


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New Year, Old Me

 Well, I meant to get back to the blog long before now. I've had a rough couple of weeks. My whole family took turns with a stomach bug, my little dog Valentine had an eye infection, my son had girlfriend drama, and a million other things were going on. Everything seems to have run it's course now, though.

I'm late on this, but my New Year's resolution is to be more optimistic in my life. I am going to try to find one good thing for every bad thing that happens.

As far as my health goes, I'm still at 290, and I haven't been exercising much. I've been doing yoga, but that doesn't really get my heart rate up. It does make me feel so much better and stronger, though.

I have signed up for a water aerobics class that starts on Monday. I'm really excited about that. Also, my gym has added a new cardio class that works better with my schedule than the others did. Now I just have to get over how much I hate my gym. I'm also signing up for the Daily Burn. I'm hoping that the different workouts will keep me motivated.

I have started getting up earlier in the mornings. This has helped me feel much less rushed. I have time to warm up to the day. This should also give me enough time to eat breakfast (always a problem) and even to fit a short workout in.

I'm still going to be logging my miles and logging my food. And my family is going back to a more plant-based diet. While my son was home, we ended up eating a lot of chicken, plus we had turkey from Christmas. On top of that my husband and I received summer sausage as a gift, so I had some of that. So we will be eating lots more greens and legumes.

So that's the plan! As always, advice and support is welcome!

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Just a Quick Post

Hi everyone! I may not be posting much this week. I sprained my ankle Saturday, so I've not been doing any exercising. Went to the doc yesterday because it was still hurting so badly. I thought maybe I had torn something in there. Nope, just a sprain. He gave me pain meds, and I'm keeping off it as much as possible (one time I'm thankful for a sedentary job).

Anyway, so I'll have to start my 5k training over once I'm back on my feet.

I stepped on the scale today, and I think I'm back down to 289. I'm not entirely sure because about the time the scale finally decided to show a number was about the time I had to shift my weight off my left foot, so I only saw the number for a second.

Anyway, since this such a short post, here are some pics of my four-legged family.

This is the only photo I've been able to get with all three dogs in the same shot. So here is Sully, Sebastian (aka Bash), and Valentine.

And here are out cats. This is Mischief (front) and Mayhem (back).

They are both over 20 pounds and are both bigger than my Valentine. They are also mean to Sully.


Someday, I'll have to post a pic of my two-legged people.

Hope everyone has a great week. I'll check in on Friday if not before.

Back Up Plan for My Back Up Plan

This was one of those morning where I needed a back up plan for my back up plan. This is a short week money-wise, so I was planning to use the gift card I won for my Halloween costume to get groceries this weekend. I spent all morning looking for it, tearing my house apart, going through pants pockets and purses. I finally found it already in my wallet.

I did manage to eat breakfast before I started searching, but the search frazzled me enough that I left my gym bag on the table. That means I can't do my jog after work today. I can't afford the gas and time it would take to drive to my town, get my clothes, and drive back to the town my job, gym, and the college is. And it's dark by the time I get home, so there's no way I'm walking outside.

I'll have to make up the run tomorrow, and since I'm already scheduled for a run on Sunday and Monday, that means running three days straight. I'm not sure I'm up for it, but I'm going to give it my best shot.

I stepped on the scale this morning for the Holiday Scale Accountability Club. I'm still not back to my starting weight for the challenge, but I'm less than half a pound away now. I just need to keep doing what I'm doing, and I'm sure the scale will cooperate.

Tonight Michael, Tori, and I are going to see the high school drama club's play about Lizzie Borden. One of Tori's friends is playing Lizzie. It's a free play, and really, how could I pass up a play about Lizzie Borden?

Since this post doesn't have any pictures yet, I'm going to add one of Sully. He is the oldest of our three dogs (we got him second, though). So here he is trying to be Michael's lapdog. Sully can take up that whole couch by himself. Then again, so can Michael.

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What I Learned in the Last Week

So even though I was only on the Whole30 for four days, I do think I learned a lot about myself from it. First let me tell you why I didn't like it.

1. I felt obsessed with food. So much of my time was consumed with what I could have and what I couldn't have. Whether I was at home or at work, all I thought of was food. It really felt unhealthy to me to be so focused on food. I mean, the whole reason I started this blog was so I could STOP obsessing over my food, right?
2. I had to eat meat. As I mentioned in a previous post, the amount of meat really bothered me. I'm fine with eating meat when I go out to eat somewhere or on special occasions, but every day and sometimes twice a day was just too much for me.
3. I didn't want to exercise. Besides the fact that I was too busy thinking about food to think about exercise, the Whole30 requires special pre- and post-workout food. My life was already complicated enough.

 Clearly, this was never going to become a lifestyle change. But even with all that, I did learn some important things from it.

 First, I learned that I need to eat breakfast. Duh, right? I knew I was supposed to. I know it's the first thing every weight loss experts says to do. But I always resisted it. I've always said I don't have time. I'm too rushed in the morning. I don't like eating early because the food feels heavy in my stomach (yeah, if you're having donuts or pancakes or biscuits). But I found on the Whole30 that I did have time to make breakfast (with a little planning), and when I ate breakfast I had a clearer head and was more focused at work. My job is one that depends entirely on reading and listening. Without breakfast (I skipped it yesterday), I can see a definite difference in my work.

Second, I consume too much sugar. A lot of you probably think this is another "duh," but it was never obvious to me. I didn't think I had that much sugar, really. I don't eat sweets. I don't ever crave candy, cookies, cake (I actually don't like cake), donuts, or the like. I did drink Coke, but that was only one a day and was something I was already trying to decrease. But I hadn't noticed how my once-in-a-while gas station cappuccino had become a daily habit or how my new-found love of apples had led to caramel dipping sauce. I don't think sugar is a trigger food for me or that I need to avoid it in things like ketchup or mayo at all costs. I don't even think I need to give up my Christmas baklava or birthday lemon icebox pie. But I do need to be more aware of what I'm eating and especially what I'm drinking.

Third, I eat too much white rice. I eat a lot of foods with rice, and I don't think rice is bad. But even though we buy a lot of brown and wild rice, I turn to white rice the most. It's my comfort food. When I'm sick, all I want to eat is white rice with butter and salt. When I make a stir fry, I'll have twice as much white rice as veggies, and I'll have a bowl of just rice for seconds. I've made stir fry with wild rice, and it's delicious. My family loves it. I love it, too, and I eat a normal amount of rice then. I need to stay away from white rice.

Fourth, my family doesn't miss meat. My vegetarian daughter and meat-allergic son are both away at college. Michael and Tori have no issues with eating meat. Tori eats it as school, and Michael ate it anytime he was away from the house. They never exactly complained about being vegetarian at home, but I could tell they missed it. Turns out, not so much. They both liked all the meals I prepared on Whole30, but they also complained about all the meat. Turns out, meat for dinner once a week or so is more than enough for them. That made me happy.

Fifth, 90 percent of my aches, pains, and morning headaches have nothing to do with my diet and everything to do with Sebastian. Bash is my husband's supposed-to-be-a-Jack-Russell-but-SURPRISE!-is-actually-more-of-a-pitbull.

Sebastian is very sweet, but only a year old and much larger than we expected.

Bash sleeps in our bed, as does my Valentine. Both dogs usually sleep at the foot of the bed, but as it's gotten colder, Bash has taken to crawling under the covers in the middle of the night. He slides in between me and Michael. This starts out fine, but at some point he turns sideways. I spend the second half of the night somehow pinned between the two dogs and with my husbands arm slung over me trying to pull my upper body closer (Sorry hon, I can't snuggle. There's 30 pounds of dog in the way). I think once we figure that situation out, my life will greatly improve.

Sixth, I already know what my body needs. I really do. I know what makes me feel good (healthy good, not spoiled brat I want my Cheetos good). I know what makes me lose weight. I know what a long term healthy lifestyle looks like for me. I just don't do it.

So the obvious conclusion to this: Do it. Do what I know is right for me. Stop being a pansy-ass.

So I will.

1307.51 / 0 / 1284.17

Headaches, Darkness, and Whole30

This is exactly how I felt this morning (except without the run-on sentence). I'm really looking forward to the time change. No more leaving the house when it's dark. No more walking the dogs when it's dark (and scary). I like a little daylight in the morning to remind me I'm not a ghost.

I went home early yesterday with a headache. It wasn't a migraine, just a really bad tension headache. So no gym, and now I'm behind at work. Blech.

This Whole30 thing is coming together. I have my lunches planned out (now that I've found some tuna without soy in it). I'm making some homemade mayo tonight. I've made some chicken stock. I have about 10 dinners planned, but I would like to up that to at least 15. So far breakfast has been my challenge.

I've just been alerted to the existence of a chicken apple sausage. I looked up the ingredients, and it looks like it would be compliant. Now I just have to check if our Wal-mart has it. Also, I have no idea if I'll like it. The only sausage I've had in the last two years has been MorningStar's vegetarian sausage. But if I can find this chicken apple thing, I'll give it a try.

I've already stated that I don't like eggs, but there are two exceptions: deviled eggs and dill pickled eggs. I can eat dill pickled eggs by the dozen, but the pickling mix I use has sugar and chemical stuff in it. So that's out. Deviled eggs I like, but I'm never tempted to eat a ton of them. If I make them with homemade mayo, they might be a breakfast options. Maybe a couple of deviled eggs with some sauteed kale and onion?

If things go according to plan (like they ever do), I should be able to start the Whole30 this weekend.

No gym until I catch up on my work.

1307.51 / 0 / 1284.17

My First Challenge!!

 I'm doing my first blog challenge! Gwen at The Sunny Coconut has started the Holiday Scale Accountability Club. The goal is to not gain any weight over the holiday season. It starts today and ends on January 9, 2015.

I know I usually only weigh on the first of the month, but the challenge requires weigh ins twice a week. So I'm going to try not to get too obsessed and weigh on Tuesdays and Fridays.

So my first weigh in this morning showed me at 289.2. That's up a pound from October 1. I was actually expecting it to be higher. I can't say I've made great choices this month with food or exercise.

Speaking of exercise, I didn't go to the gym last night. I had to work late, so I went straight home after. My clothes are still here in the office though, so I will make it in today.

I've been looking at the pretty pictures of fall leaves on other blogs and on my picture of Walden Pond above. I love fall leaves. I love the colors and the way they drift down in a breeze. It's not something I see much of in real life.

I live in northwest Tennessee. We don't usually get much of a fall season here. We get a late summer, then maybe two days of fall, and then...rain. Rain, rain, and rain. Rain that beats the leaves off of trees. Rain that pounds the pretty fall colors right into the mud. By the time the rain stops, the cold has set in, everything is gray and washed out, and there is mud everywhere. It stays that way until it freezes. Then when it's supposed to be spring we get more rain, more mud, and maybe even some snow flurries (not actual snow. Oh no, that would be too pretty.). Then the sun comes out, dries everything up, and we get a week of green leaves, budding trees, and flowers. Then it's summer, hot, humid, and icky. So out of the entire year, there are really only about 10 days I want to be outside. Oh, well.

Tomorrow I'm traveling to the nearest "big town" (I live in a small town. Then you have big town, small city, good-sized city, and big city). It's a 45 minute drive, but I'm hoping it's worth it. That town has a YMCA with one of those machines that measure your body composition and stuff. They let you have two free readings a year even if you aren't a member. So I'm heading there tomorrow to see what I can learn about myself. Yes, I do have a Village People CD in my car. Why do you ask?

IF (and that's a big if. See the capital letters?) it isn't raining, I'm also going to try to do something outside. This summer I tried to relearn how to ride a bike. It's not as easy as people say. I was moderately successful. Maybe I'll go for a ride or at least take my little dog to the park. I just want to do something before I start my 6 month seclusion from the elements.

My Valentine. He's the bestest best thing ever!

I'd like to do more than just maintain my weight during the holiday season, but I'm hesitant to put forth a weight loss goal. I'm thinking instead of having some fitness goals. Of course, getting closer to Walden will be one, but there are other things I'd like to do. I'll have to think about that this weekend.

I don't usually blog on the weekends, so I'll see you all on Monday. Have a great weekend, and if you are somewhere with beautifully changing leaves on the trees, take some time to enjoy them!


1307.51 / 0 / 1286.44

Rainy Day Blahs

What is it about a rainy day that makes me want to curl up and sleep. It started raining last night where I live. This made it terribly hard for me to sleep. For one thing, the noise of the rain was distracting. For another, my Great Pyr is afraid of storms, so he kept trying to climb into bed with us. There's just not enough room for that.

After a long, long night, I hit the snooze too many times this morning. In all my rushing to get my morning chores done, I forgot about breakfast entirely. That led to some not great choices at lunch today, but I'll talk more about that tomorrow.

The main thing I want to focus on today is that I finally got some walking done at the gym. I'm one and a half miles closer to Walden! I'm really dragging today, but I wanted to get that out there.


So here is my food from yesterday.

Breakfast: White chocolate cappuccino and grapes because I forgot my breakfast yesterday, too. 418 cal

Lunch: Whole wheat pita stuffed with black beans, hummus, cucumber, and spinach with eggplant patties. 485 cal

Dinner: Burrito made with a whole wheat tortilla, sweet potatoes, black beans, guacamole, and cheese, with a side of salad. I didn't eat the salad; it was too wilted. 426

Snack: Fudge Pop. 40

Daily Total: 1369



Not bad, really, considering my morning routine is all out of whack.

I also went to the gym yesterday. The bank of treadmills was completely empty, so I was worried they still hadn't fixed the power. But everything was running great! So I hopped on for 30 minutes of walking. I was hoping to get two miles in, but I guess that's what happens when you're out of the habit. Hopefully it won't take me long to get back up to a 15 minute mile.

Be sure to check back tomorrow to hear about what a train wreck today has been.


1307.51 / 1.5 / 1289.68