Some Pain, but No Gain

The good news is that I haven't gained any weight in the last week. On the other hand, I haven't lost any, either. I'm still at 290. It's really frustrating. I have been tracking my food, and I have been exercising every day. This is the point where I would usually say, "Forget this. If I'm not losing weight, I might as well have Coke and pizza." But I'm not going to do that this time. Instead, I'm just going to continue what I've been doing. If I haven't lost anything by the end of the month, then I'll readjust what I'm doing. For now, this still feels right.

As I said, I have not missed a single Daily Burn workout. I'm really enjoying these. I can feel myself getting stronger. My balance has improved, and my endurance is improving, too. For the first two weeks I'm doing the same three routines, and I can tell that I'm able to push myself harder than I was at the beginning. I have had consistently sore muscles, not so sore that I don't want to move, but sore enough that I can tell I'm doing something.

I've been doing great with lunches this week. I always have a salad in the fridge at work in case I forget to bring mine. If I don't forget, I can still have the salad with my lunch. Today I'm having a salad and a winter soup with rutabaga and carrots. Yum!

I've also managed to eat something for breakfast every day. This is a huge issue for me. I hate eating in the morning. But I've been forcing myself to at least have a piece of fruit or a Fiber One bar. Some days, I've even managed to have a "fried" (non-stick pan with a spritz of oil) egg on a whole wheat English muffin.

I haven't made it to the gym yet to get some miles in. I need to do some mending on my workout clothes before I go, but I should have that done tonight. I've been doing my DB workouts in my pajamas. I just throw a sports bra on under them. Not how I want to appear at the gym, haha! If I can get the pants mended tonight, I can get some miles in tomorrow after work.

The one downside to my week so far: I saw a video of myself. I'm playing a part in a tutorial for work. Last week they filmed a rehearsal, and I was able to see the footage yesterday. UGH!! I know I'm big. I've seen pictures; I have a mirror. But I look so much bigger on that video! I couldn't believe it.
On the other hand, I have a much prettier face than I thought I did, and I think those workouts are improving my posture. I usually have a little bit of a hunch (I'm 5'9" and wear an I cup bra, so...). But in the video, I'm shot from the side for part of it. No hunch! Hooray! I have noticed I have way less back pain since starting these workouts.

And bonus! I have only had one headache this week! It was just a regular headache, too, not a migraine. That's a huge deal. I don't know if it's because of the exercising or because my salt intake is way down or what, but I'm happy about it.

So that's my week so far. I'm still hoping for a woosh on the scale to bring me into the 280s by the end of the week, but if it doesn't happen, I'm going to try to focus on the other positive changes happening in my body.

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What I Learned in the Last Week

So even though I was only on the Whole30 for four days, I do think I learned a lot about myself from it. First let me tell you why I didn't like it.

1. I felt obsessed with food. So much of my time was consumed with what I could have and what I couldn't have. Whether I was at home or at work, all I thought of was food. It really felt unhealthy to me to be so focused on food. I mean, the whole reason I started this blog was so I could STOP obsessing over my food, right?
2. I had to eat meat. As I mentioned in a previous post, the amount of meat really bothered me. I'm fine with eating meat when I go out to eat somewhere or on special occasions, but every day and sometimes twice a day was just too much for me.
3. I didn't want to exercise. Besides the fact that I was too busy thinking about food to think about exercise, the Whole30 requires special pre- and post-workout food. My life was already complicated enough.

 Clearly, this was never going to become a lifestyle change. But even with all that, I did learn some important things from it.

 First, I learned that I need to eat breakfast. Duh, right? I knew I was supposed to. I know it's the first thing every weight loss experts says to do. But I always resisted it. I've always said I don't have time. I'm too rushed in the morning. I don't like eating early because the food feels heavy in my stomach (yeah, if you're having donuts or pancakes or biscuits). But I found on the Whole30 that I did have time to make breakfast (with a little planning), and when I ate breakfast I had a clearer head and was more focused at work. My job is one that depends entirely on reading and listening. Without breakfast (I skipped it yesterday), I can see a definite difference in my work.

Second, I consume too much sugar. A lot of you probably think this is another "duh," but it was never obvious to me. I didn't think I had that much sugar, really. I don't eat sweets. I don't ever crave candy, cookies, cake (I actually don't like cake), donuts, or the like. I did drink Coke, but that was only one a day and was something I was already trying to decrease. But I hadn't noticed how my once-in-a-while gas station cappuccino had become a daily habit or how my new-found love of apples had led to caramel dipping sauce. I don't think sugar is a trigger food for me or that I need to avoid it in things like ketchup or mayo at all costs. I don't even think I need to give up my Christmas baklava or birthday lemon icebox pie. But I do need to be more aware of what I'm eating and especially what I'm drinking.

Third, I eat too much white rice. I eat a lot of foods with rice, and I don't think rice is bad. But even though we buy a lot of brown and wild rice, I turn to white rice the most. It's my comfort food. When I'm sick, all I want to eat is white rice with butter and salt. When I make a stir fry, I'll have twice as much white rice as veggies, and I'll have a bowl of just rice for seconds. I've made stir fry with wild rice, and it's delicious. My family loves it. I love it, too, and I eat a normal amount of rice then. I need to stay away from white rice.

Fourth, my family doesn't miss meat. My vegetarian daughter and meat-allergic son are both away at college. Michael and Tori have no issues with eating meat. Tori eats it as school, and Michael ate it anytime he was away from the house. They never exactly complained about being vegetarian at home, but I could tell they missed it. Turns out, not so much. They both liked all the meals I prepared on Whole30, but they also complained about all the meat. Turns out, meat for dinner once a week or so is more than enough for them. That made me happy.

Fifth, 90 percent of my aches, pains, and morning headaches have nothing to do with my diet and everything to do with Sebastian. Bash is my husband's supposed-to-be-a-Jack-Russell-but-SURPRISE!-is-actually-more-of-a-pitbull.

Sebastian is very sweet, but only a year old and much larger than we expected.

Bash sleeps in our bed, as does my Valentine. Both dogs usually sleep at the foot of the bed, but as it's gotten colder, Bash has taken to crawling under the covers in the middle of the night. He slides in between me and Michael. This starts out fine, but at some point he turns sideways. I spend the second half of the night somehow pinned between the two dogs and with my husbands arm slung over me trying to pull my upper body closer (Sorry hon, I can't snuggle. There's 30 pounds of dog in the way). I think once we figure that situation out, my life will greatly improve.

Sixth, I already know what my body needs. I really do. I know what makes me feel good (healthy good, not spoiled brat I want my Cheetos good). I know what makes me lose weight. I know what a long term healthy lifestyle looks like for me. I just don't do it.

So the obvious conclusion to this: Do it. Do what I know is right for me. Stop being a pansy-ass.

So I will.

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Day 2 of Whole30

No headache today! Yippee! I can still feel some residual pain from it. Kind the outlines of the migraine from yesterday.

This morning I had eggs and leeks & asparagus for breakfast again, but this time I fried the eggs. It was a lot better that way. I was pretty hungry since I basically skipped dinner last night.

Right after breakfast Tori and I started practicing our Halloween makeup so that we can apply it quickly on the big day. I hate it when Halloween falls on a weekday. At least until we finally get it made a government holiday, LOL. When my kids were little, I'd take the day off and pull them from school a couple of hours early, just to get everything got done.

I had the same lunch as yesterday. I still don't like the tuna, but tuna and deviled eggs were going to be my go to lunch options for the work week. I definitely have to find some new mayo.

For dinner I had pork chops, sauerkraut, and roasted zucchini and eggplants. It was okay. It has been about two years since I had pork chops (pig meat was never high on my list even when I regularly consumed flesh). There is just something weird about the texture.

I'm going to head to bed soon. The headache echo is still lingering. And if I go to bed, I won't be tempted to eat everything.

So far, Whole30 has me obsessively thinking about food and craving things I normally wouldn't even think about, like ice cream and candy. I'm sure it's just the fact that I can't have these things that is making me want them so much. I'm hoping it will be easier tomorrow, since I'll have work to focus on.

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...GO! Whole30 Day 1

My first day of the Whole30 was not enjoyable. I started the day with a horrible headache. It wasn't a migraine, but I couldn't take ibuprofen for it because that has sugar in it. I drank lots of water and hoped it would ease as the day went on.

For breakfast I had deviled eggs made with homemade mayo. It was not good. I need to try a new recipe for the mayo. It has no flavor at all. I also had leeks and asparagus cooked in ghee. That was freaking awesome. I made a huge batch so that I can just reheat it for the next couple of days.

I went grocery shopping. After I got home I made up some more kale chips and roasted some cashews (I couldn't find any pre-roasted with out soy). My head was still killing me, so I took a hot bath. Sometimes the hot water or steam helps. It didn't this time.

For lunch I had tuna and celery (made with the flavorless homemade mayo) on a bed of spinach, kale chips, pickles, and a handful of the cashews. I over-salted the kale chips, and of course the tuna was nasty, but I ate it anyway.

By the time I finished lunch, I was feeling nauseated. This wasn't because of the bland tuna. My headache was morphing into a migraine. I gave it another hour to be sure, but mid afternoon I took one of my migraine pills. I went to bed and slept for several hours.

I woke up around 7:00. My headache had eased some, but was still kind of there. I was really hungry, but still a little nauseated. We had apples on the counter, so I grabbed one of those. Then I went back to bed.

That was it until this morning. I'll post about today later tonight.

Anyway, Day 1 sucked, but it wasn't related to the Whole30.  Here's to a better day today!

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